In order to create a future we’ve never created before, we have to create thoughts we’ve never thought before!
When you notice a thought that is not serving the future you want to create or that you just don’t want to think anymore, sometimes you will want to get rid of it right away. You want to make that change and make it today. You find a thought that you believe and feels better to you.
Then you practice thinking it! Your brain believes it’s true, but just forgets to think it sometimes. You have to practice thinking the new thought to make it the go-to thought. This works well for a thought we want to think AND that is true for us right now. A good example I use as a coach is “I have valuable content I can offer for free.” I believe this thought right now and I want to think it–sometimes I just forget to think it! When I do think it, I feel motivation and confidence and I use that to fuel the action of writing this blog and posting on social media and sending emails, etc.
But sometimes the thought you want to think is not available to you yet because your brain rejects it. It believes it’s very untrue. In the same vein, this might be a thought for me like “I am a million dollar coach.” My brain immediately rejects that because I’m not earning millions of dollars and my brain doesn’t (yet) see a way to make this true. It doesn’t end up being helpful to think a thought that is untrue to you right now because your brain fights it.
Here’s an example for body image. If you think “I hate my body. It’s so disgusting.” And I offer that you should think “I love my body. It’s so beautiful.” Your brain will immediately reject this thought as untrue. It will treat that thought as a falsehood, as if I suggested you think something like “the sky is red.”
But you want to think that thought. You want to love your body. You want to believe that it is beautiful. This is a thought you believe will serve you and it for sure feels better than loathing.
How do we start thinking thoughts that are not yet believable to our brains?
We bridge and ladder them.
If you want to bridge your thought, you add some qualifiers to the beginning of the thought:
- I’m learning that. . .
- I’m becoming a person who. . .
- It’s possible that. . .
In action this looks like these thoughts:
“I’m learning that my body is beautiful.”
“I’m becoming a person who loves my body.”
“It’s possible that I can love my body.”
These thoughts help you get from your current unintentional model to an intentional model. When you open up your brain to just the possibility of these thoughts, it automatically seeks evidence to prove the thought true.
You can also try some laddering thoughts. These go in a stair step type fashion.
“I hate my body.”
“I have a human body.”
“Humans bodies come in all different shapes.”
“Maybe my shape is worthy of love.”
“I’m considering that my human body is lovable.”
“My body is lovable.”
“I love my body.”
You take as many steps as you need to get to the desired thought. You practice each thought on the ladder until it is believable. You may not need all these steps–your ladder might just have 3-4 rungs on it. It’s simply a tool to get to a thought that you want to believe, but is not yet accessible to your brain. You’ll know you need a bridge or ladder if you immediately reject the new thought. If you think it might be impossible to believe, I would say believe it anyway! And we can bridge and ladder your way there.
You can always learn to believe a thought that is useful to you!
If you need some help finding some bridge or ladder thoughts, let me help! I’d love to have a chat with you–click below to schedule!
